Emotional intelligence to me is the ability to see your self not as someone attached to their emotional guards but as someone who is conscious of their capacity to choose love in every word, thought, decision and action.
To me it is the ability to look at oneself and understand ones emotions without indulging in ones emotions.
You can experience a greater depth of reality when you’re able to look at the self separate from the emotions. Just as thoughts are separate from the self so are emotions, in this way you can observe and analyse them for what they truly are: a navigational system, an indicator of what is going on in the world within. These emotions are not you, I think they can be better explained as expressions of self
The war is to remain conscious in choosing what will be the occupier of your current state within a circumstance. When we allow our emotions to get in the way what makes us any different to little children who throw temper tantrums when they do not get their way?
It’s a continued journey of evolving, if you’re lucky you have people to help keep you in check- but as adults we are expected to self regulate- we are capable but everyone is dealing with their own realities and emotions. It makes it all the more important that we are firm in our understanding of emotional intelligence, so we are not reactant and invaded by our emotions unconsciously.
We always have control and it is important that we know this so that can grow healthy non confrontational and progressive relationships and so that when we are met with truth we are able to navigate as clearly and as openly as possible with empathy for ourselves and others.